Genealogy Forum UK

Bit of an odd question. If your mother was your father's second wife, what is your relationship to your father's first wife? Step child? Ancestry seems to think so, but I've never heard it applied backwards in time, rather than to a later marriage

i would of thought nothing its only a step parent or step child when your part of the first relationship (child) into the second relationship when partner of his natural parent, that what i think ?

admin wrote:Bit of an odd question. If your mother was your father's second wife, what is your relationship to your father's first wife? Step child? Ancestry seems to think so, but I've never heard it applied backwards in time, rather than to a later marriage

I would also think "nothing", you can only be a step child if you are taken on by your mother or father's new spouse. From Wiki "The traditional and strictest definition of a “stepfamily” is a married couple where one or both members of the couple have pre-existing children who live with them".

It's strange if so, as a child from the first marriage would obviously be a half-sibling of a child from the later marriage, yet there's no term to define the relationship between the later child and earlier spouse. We have step relationships, half relationships and "blended" families, but nothing to describe what must be a very common scenario these days? A child from the middle marriage is step child of a later spouse, but a "nothing" to the earlier one?

Would a later child have a relationship with an earlier spouse?
Certainly with the people I know who've been married several times and have kids, the later kids have no contact with the earlier spouse even if they have contact with older half siblings. This contact is always through the common parent.

Although my 7 year old nephew thinks that it would be a good idea to take his new half sibling (by his mother) with him when he visits his father, so they can all play together!

My son and his wife had two children and split up a few years ago. His ex remarried and they had two children who I love and see often and they think I'm their nanny. Won't ever tell them I'm not - until perhaps when they're grown up. Don't think there's a term for that either, I'm just nanny Maggie

snoopysue wrote:Would a later child have a relationship with an earlier spouse?

A friend of mine invites her husband's first wife to all extended family occasions such as christenings and confirmations. Says that since the woman's children are there it is natural to invite her too. Guess it might depend on how and when the marriage broke up

gardener wrote:

snoopysue wrote:Would a later child have a relationship with an earlier spouse?

A friend of mine invites her husband's first wife to all extended family occasions such as christenings and confirmations. Says that since the woman's children are there it is natural to invite her too. Guess it might depend on how and when the marriage broke up

I think it's great that a family can get on like that, especially as the "unconventional familes" are fast becoming the norm.
With my sister's ex husband it's not that amicable. He was unfaithful with his first wife and was sneaky enough that my sister didn't catch on - I an understand that wife number one thinks my sister's a witch! He was then unfaithful with his second wife (my sister), when she was pregnant and after the birth. My sister confronted him - he denied it, but she later caught him out in a lie. He claims that the new girlfriend (now wife number three) didn't know he was married at the start. (I would have liked to be a fly on the wall when he asked if he could move in with the girlfriend, explaining the wife, oh and don't forget the 2 month old baby son!!).
When he picks up my nephew, the new wife is never there, sometimes she's deposited at a local supermarket - so my sister has never met her. Maybe the ex is afraid of what my sister could tell her about her husband!! I must say my sister has never acted the injured party and has never used her son as a weapon with her ex (unlike his first wife), and hopefully my nephew will have a balenced view of his parents!