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Re: What cheeses me off!!!!
Posted: Mon Apr 23, 2012 5:31 pm
by snoopysue
Lulu wrote:When you grew up with, truly, nothing, even less than nothing and then in your 80s to have so much money thrown at her, it's a bit hard for her to get her head round it all and the tax and inheritance tax thing completely fries her brain. I had never realised how horrible a situation it is as she is being made to think all the time about whether she will live another 7 years, or not.
The whole thing is really bothering her.
In a way she is already giving to charity, she loves clothes and to fills her time, she keeps buying them and then decides she doesn't like them, so sends them to the Charity Shops. There must be some very well dressed women in Stourbridge & Halesowen now.
I'm taking her away for a few days, when we get back I think I'm going to have to sit her down with someone, who knows what's what, to give her some peace of mind because she is driving me mad with it and all I get out of it is an expanding waistline, as she wants to buy me lunch everytime I see her.
Don't know what the rules are in the UK Lulu, but in Denmark you can give a certain amount to children, grandchildren, etc every year without them having to pay any tax or anything on it. It is also possible to "lend" them a larger amount, with the remaining debt being reduced by the same amount as you are aloud to give them per annum.
Re: What cheeses me off!!!!
Posted: Mon Apr 23, 2012 7:03 pm
by Lulu
I'm trying to look into that Snoops but as I say Mum is very old school about her money in one respect and doesn't like to talk about it but it doesn't stop her driving me and my sister mad with her constant worrying about it. (And doing some pretty silly things too
)
There is a TV Programme tonight, Panorama, which shows a woman in what was supposed to be an excellent Care Home, being assaulted by the 'caring' Staff. One ended up in prison. Makes you wonder what we have to look forward to, I was hoping Mum (if the need arises) ever needed to go into a home, at least she could afford a good one.
No guarantee of anything when you're old and not able to communicate.
Re: What cheeses me off!!!!
Posted: Tue Apr 24, 2012 6:35 pm
by snoopysue
Lulu wrote:I'm trying to look into that Snoops but as I say Mum is very old school about her money in one respect and doesn't like to talk about it but it doesn't stop her driving me and my sister mad with her constant worrying about it. (And doing some pretty silly things too
)
There is a TV Programme tonight, Panorama, which shows a woman in what was supposed to be an excellent Care Home, being assaulted by the 'caring' Staff. One ended up in prison. Makes you wonder what we have to look forward to, I was hoping Mum (if the need arises) ever needed to go into a home, at least she could afford a good one.
No guarantee of anything when you're old and not able to communicate.
Does make you a bit worried, hearing about the bad homes.
All I can say is both my grandmothers were excellantly looked after in their respective homes. My maternal grandmother had dementia, and she'd stayed at her nursing home several times (mostly when my parents were on holiday), before she actually moved in. When her dementia wasn't too bad she looked forward to these visits and treated them as her holiday. They looked after her very well, and although in the last few months of her life, they could have said she was too ill for that home, they chose to keep her for as long as they had the resources, which meant she didn't have to go through the trauma of adjusting to a new place.
My paternal grandmother was also very well looked after, she had all her marbles but became very frail in her mid 90's - she'd lived in her own home until then. Again the staff were great, and we had no complaints.
Re: What cheeses me off!!!!
Posted: Tue Apr 24, 2012 7:36 pm
by Lulu
Pleased to hear it. There must be lots of good ones, it's just so scary, when you hear of cases like that. My next door neighbour is a Rehabilitation Community Nurse, she was crying when she saw the Panorama Programme. I hope that if I ever need caring for I get someone like my little angel, next door.
Re: What cheeses me off!!!!
Posted: Wed Apr 25, 2012 2:38 pm
by snoopysue
Lulu wrote:Pleased to hear it. There must be lots of good ones, it's just so scary, when you hear of cases like that. My next door neighbour is a Rehabilitation Community Nurse, she was crying when she saw the Panorama Programme. I hope that if I ever need caring for I get someone like my little angel, next door.
Trouble is whenever there is a program highlighting a problem, they forget to say that it's only a small proportion that's like that.